RIP doubling: Submission Preview

The submissions for this assignment are posts in the assignment's discussion. Below are the discussion posts for Miguel Angel Johan Ruiz Romo, or you can view the full discussion.

Miguel Angel Johan Ruiz Romo

Original:

Hello there fellow struggler. I see you are stuck between two very difficult choices and you are afraid of letting either one of them go. It seems like you are deep in love with this girl since you were not rude to her or expressed any type of hate when you saw her again during the dinner and afterwards. Her wanting you back is a good sign since she is willing to change her mind and give up some of her dignity and pride in admitting that she truly made a horrible mistake. I was exactly in your position when me and my boyfriend decided to give each other "time" and think about our future and what we really wanted for ourselves. This was possibly the best decision of our relationship since we realized that we wanted each other.

Revised:

Hello there fellow struggler. I see you are stuck between two difficult choices. It seems like you really like this girl since you were not rude to her or expressed any type of hate when you saw her again during the dinner and afterwards. Her wanting you back is a good sign since she is willing to change her mind and admitting that she made a mistake. I was exactly in your position when me and my partner, now my soul mate, decided to give each other "time" and think about our future. This was a good decision in our relationship since we realized that we wanted each other.

Response: I chose to remove any significant diction form this paragraph to give it a general vague meaning with very few emotional significance. My goal was to take away as much emotion as possible and make this paragraph gender neutral were initially it was a female talking.

Revised:

Hello there lost love bird . I see your heart is confused and stuck between two very difficult choices and you are afraid of letting either one of them go ask if they were a part of you. It seems like you are deep in love with this girl since you were not rude to her or expressed any type of hate when you saw her again during the dinner and afterwards. Her wanting you back is a good sign since she is willing to change her mind and give up some of her dignity and pride in admitting that she truly made a horrible mistake and she may indeed find it in her heart that you were here prince charming. I was exactly in your position when me and my boyfriend, now my beloved husband, decided to give each other "time" and think about our future and what we really wanted for ourselves. This was possibly the best decision of our relationship since we realized that we wanted each other.

Response: In this paragraph I chose to add different use of diction that openly expresses emotion more than the first paragraph. My goal for this paragraph was to over exaggerate emotion like a female would(follow social norm), thus letting the reader know that a female is talking.

Original:
Hello there fellow struggler. I see you are stuck between two very difficult choices and you are afraid of letting either one of them go. It seems like you are deep in love with this girl since you were not rude to her or expressed any type of hate when you saw her again during the dinner and afterwards. Her wanting you back is a good sign since she is willing to change her mind and give up some of her dignity and pride in admitting that she truly made a horrible mistake. I was exactly in your position when me and my boyfriend decided to give each other "time" and think about our future and what we really wanted for ourselves. This was possibly the best decision of our relationship since we realized that we wanted each other.
 
Revised:
Hello there fellow struggler. I see you are stuck between two difficult choices. It seems like you really like this girl since you were not rude to her or expressed any type of hate when you saw her again during the dinner and afterwards. Her wanting you back is a good sign since she is willing to change her mind and admitting that she made a mistake. I was exactly in your position when me and my partner, now my soul mate, decided to give each other "time" and think about our future. This was a good decision in our relationship since we realized that we wanted each other.
Response: I chose to remove any significant diction form this paragraph to give it a general vague meaning with very few emotional significance. My goal was to take away as much emotion as possible and make this paragraph gender neutral were initially it was a female talking.
            Revised:
Hello there lost love bird . I see your heart is confused and stuck between two very difficult choices and you are afraid of letting either one of them go ask if they were a part of you. It seems like you are deep in love with this girl since you were not rude to her or expressed any type of hate when you saw her again during the dinner and afterwards. Her wanting you back is a good sign since she is willing to change her mind and give up some of her dignity and pride in admitting that she truly made a horrible mistake and she may indeed find it in her heart that you were here prince charming. I was exactly in your position when me and my boyfriend, now my beloved husband, decided to give each other "time" and think about our future and what we really wanted for ourselves. This was possibly the best decision of our relationship since we realized that we wanted each other.
            Response: In this paragraph I chose to add different use of diction that openly expresses emotion more than the first paragraph. My goal for this paragraph was to over exaggerate emotion like a female would(follow social norm), thus letting the reader know that a female is talking.